So, seriously?

I keep getting these spam emails about Colon Cleanse.  On principle, I delete all spam without opening it (and most chains emails too, so don't forward me that stuff if you don't want the "chain broken" and the "good luck" to end).  However, on my iPhone I can see a few lines of my emails without actually opening them, so I got to see this before I hit delete:

Lose 20 pounds from your colon in three days!

Wow, that sounds so appealing.  Really.  I mean it.  I was just thinking how much I would like to spend a bunch of money and then spend three days in my bathroom.  Swimsuit season is coming up and losing 20 pounds would help me achieve that skeletal look men find so sexy. Maybe I could lose a few more pounds during my subsequent hospital stay.  Sign me up.

I have an alternative plan for anyone who wants to spend a bunch of money and then spend three days in the bathroom, but doesn't want the hassle of ordering a product online and then waiting for it to arrive.  Lick the cart handle next time you go grocery shopping.