Monday, January 5, 2009

So I harbored fugitives yesterday

All opinions stated here are entirely my own.  I could be way off on some things.  I don't really care.  This is my blog.

Big Jim is on marriage number three.  He is currently married to Coco - Truck's mom.  He has kids from his first two marriages. The kids from his second marriage have a normal father/kid relationship with him and a normal step-sibling, step-kid, in-law, whatever relationship with the rest of us.  However, the girls from his first marriage are seriously screwed up.

Is this entirely his fault?  Probably not, but I believe they like to think so.

Anyway, I'm not out to analyze Big Jim's relationship with any one.  I am just here to rant about some crappy behavior.

Saturday one of the girls (her husband actually) left a message on Big Jim & Coco's answering machine.  The gist of it was that they were on a road trip and heading home and they would like to spend Sunday night with them.

Here is what I heard:

Hi, we have barely spoken to you in years.  We have never sent you pictures of your 2&1/2 year old grandson.  We never acknowledge any gifts you send our kids.  We ignored a heartfelt 8-page letter you sent several years ago.  Now we would like to descend on you with no notice on a Sunday afternoon when you have to work Monday morning. We would like for you to find room for us and our 3 kids (two of them teenagers) to sleep.  We would like to arrive early enough that you feel obligated to feed us two, possibly three meals.  We will probably also use this time to mention some monetary hardships we have experienced lately.  Also, do you have booze in the house? We love drinking other people's booze.

As I said before, I could be way off, but I doubt I am too far off.

Now we arrive at the rant portion of the post.  

You bitches have no idea what you are missing!  Big Jim and Coco are awesome grandparents. You have totally screwed your kids.  I suspect that this was the last straw for them.  If it isn't, it should be.

They proudly displayed your kid's photos (the ones they HAD anyway) along side the photos of the grandkids they see regularly.  They always answered 8 when asked how many grandkids they had (I suspect that will drop to 3).  And most importantly (to you anyway) Coco always went out of her way to buy your kids gifts.  That is probably over too.

Side tangent rant about Abercrombie & Fitch ahead...
Coco even went into Abercrombie & Fitch for your kids?  Do you know what Abercrombie & Fitch is like for a grandmother?  HELL!  It is probably what she imagines HELL to be like.  I am 35 and can barely tolerate walking past A & F in the mall.  The music is so loud that it makes Worm cry. Huck likes to stand outside and do the robot, but even he won't go in and he is only a few years shy of your target shoppers.

How do I know that they are done with you.  Because they HID FROM YOU AT MY HOUSE YESTERDAY.  They did not return your calls and made themselves scarce for several hours to ensure missing you entirely.  

Yesterday I sang a little Tom Petty & the Hearbreakers for Coco (You Don't Have to Live Like a Refugee).  Yes, she thinks I am odd, but she knows I love her and Big Jim will always harbor them.


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